I was so hurt by some people in the Church who had every appearance of piety and holiness and who commanded respect and devotion from the faithful for that veneer. From a place of that hurt, I saw people taking pictures of their altar boys and remembered being in a starry-eyed trusting place that had not been merited by those I trusted and had been violated. The liturgy was elaborate and overwhelming to the sense and I longed for silence and a dirt floor and a few minutes with our Lord without all the show and egos parading around. It was not the fault of the liturgy. But that's the place I was in. Just grieving and hurting. I started crying and couldn't stop and left until I could find forgiveness.
I would love to know what caused you to walk out of that Mass. The TLM is beautiful but isn’t the cure-all for what ails the church.
I was so hurt by some people in the Church who had every appearance of piety and holiness and who commanded respect and devotion from the faithful for that veneer. From a place of that hurt, I saw people taking pictures of their altar boys and remembered being in a starry-eyed trusting place that had not been merited by those I trusted and had been violated. The liturgy was elaborate and overwhelming to the sense and I longed for silence and a dirt floor and a few minutes with our Lord without all the show and egos parading around. It was not the fault of the liturgy. But that's the place I was in. Just grieving and hurting. I started crying and couldn't stop and left until I could find forgiveness.
Beautiful post, spoke directly to my heart and helped dissolve the snares of doubt.
Thank you. And thanks be to God if it helped loosen those snares in any way. That was my sincere hope.