A Lenten Alleluia (Shhhh…)
Becoming a grandmother for the first time is not so much about adding something to motherhood but about peeling away layers of understanding and working toward dead center of vocation. What is vocation? What is motherhood? Who am I? Who is…this stunning tiny she?
When my first granddaughter was born on Ash Wednesday, I thought… well, that’s so perfectly Lenten! Birth was traumatic and so difficult on her brave parents, but all are well. And the questions continue…
Why do we sorrow and travail? Why are the innocent shaken? Why did He hang upon that Cross?
As I watched the sun rise on Ash Wednesday, I considered how Lent was already a school of suffering, fear, surrender, and trust for the young parents. I thought of the little baby for whom all this struggle was fought… a beautiful tiny alleluia. Yes, even during Lent.
Several years ago, I became certified as a Birth and Bereavement Doula because I wanted to accompany women through the most transformational moments of their lives. To be there for those who would receive life into their hands for their efforts… and also for those who would endure suffering with only the promise of a breathless child.
Shortly after that, I became pregnant and so my plans were shelved as I entered once again into my own surrender to motherhood, reminded (endlessly) that the point is not our plans but our love. That our knowledge is only sanctified when it is put into service wherever God wills. Becoming a grandma was far from my mind. But I see what He’s doing with me… and okay, Lord… let’s go deeper. But on Your power, not mine. Your will, not mine.
Life is filled with little Lents, where we walk blindly into a darkness which doesn’t promise earthly reward, but clears the way for eternity. We don’t always get the consolation of the precious child or the bodily healing or the restored relationship…
But for the Christian, there is always the little persistent alleluia which cannot be fully expunged. And today, that reminder has a full head of dark hair and the sweetness of innocence.
Transforming Grief Through Movement
I recently wrote a guest post for Pietra Fitness called Transforming Grief Through Movement and it seems entirely appropriate to the times and season to post here today.
Wherever you are and whatever grief or loss you carry, perhaps we can walk together for a couple minutes.
I sat on the cold bathroom floor working up the courage to go downstairs and prepare lunch. The kids’ exclamations told me that an unexpected guest had arrived and I sighed a deep deep sigh. Through no fault of her own, our cherished guest was sitting in the home of a woman who could not function… could not leave the bathroom. “I cannot do this,” I whispered to no one. Grief sat like a refrigerator in my gut. It didn’t fit inside. I couldn’t get it out. It just kept me pinned to the floor, seemingly purposeless and brutally painful…
(Photo is not of yoga but of two of my dear SoulCore sisters leading retreat in 2021.)
Maybe Give up Yoga for Lent?
I know, I know… it’s just exercise. But it isn’t… even if that’s what you intend. There are non-Hindu alternatives to calming your nervous system and increasing strength and flexibility in your body. So while I’m going to leave the deeper treatment of yoga—what it is and why you shouldn’t do it—to another day, I’ll just leave one challenge on the table:
What if you just gave it up for 40 days? What if you explored some other options which don’t involve sequencing or roots tied to non-Christian spirituality? What if you fasted from this one preference and replaced it with something… temporarily with an openness to permanence?
What if you gave it all to God and asked Him to help you discern this change? Tell Him you’ll give Him 40 days in exchange for deepening conversion to His heart… wherever that leads?
Not sure why you would even want to give it up? Start with Fr. Ezra’s series HERE. And then maybe visit a couple alternatives:
SoulCore
I am a SoulCore leader and can verify that it is not yoga. SoulCore is an apostolate that intentionally engages the whole person in the sacred experience of the rosary. Integrating the prayers of the rosary with core strengthening, stretching and functional movements to nourish body & soul and encourage deeper reflection on the virtues. A gentle path to grow in virtue and cultivate interior peace. You can search for classes local to you or try out their online studio HERE.
Pietra Fitness
I am currently in training to become a Pietra Fitness instructor and find the program truly rooted in a solid foundation of Catholicism with a deliberate and specific detachment from the spiritual practices of yoga. The physical exercises used in Pietra Fitness classes are designed to increase your flexibility, develop your muscle and core strength, and increase your range of motion, posture, and stability… without occult roots. Look for classes local to you or try their online studio HERE.
I pursued both of these beautiful options in addition to my personal trainer certification in order to offer right-ordered options for movement and peace in the midst the faithfulness world. By this time next year, I hope to have conquered my fear of technology sufficiently to offer online classes. However…
Perhaps just walk with me silently for 40 days?
Yes, congratulaaaaaations! This is so great, and that is so much hair! Awww
--Maria :]
Congratulations Melody! How time flies, and how much I’ve missed the last couple years. I see my own children grow up, but forget that others’ children are doing the same! Being a grandmother is awesome. We became grandparents, too, in the last year, and expect our second granddaughter in May. And yes, it is kind of surreal to be “Grammy,” and also still be mothering young children.